Batman: Odyssey Vol II, No. 1
Jul. 29th, 2024 08:17 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
masterghandalfThis is a crosspost from Das_Sporking2. Previous installments of this spork may be found here.
Warning: This issue features some violence and is also image-heavy.
MG: Well, everyone, it’s time to continue our journey through Neal Adams’ Batman: Odyssey, as we leave Volume I behind and officially enter Volume II! Last time, Batman made it to Arkham, fought a guy named Dr. Slattern (who mercifully immediately changed his name to “Trigger” instead) learned that the head of Arkham, Dr. Chu, is really Ra’s al Ghul’s son Sensei and the one behind everything he’s been facing in this series, and decided the time has come to go on an odyssey… after taking a nap in the middle of the Batcave, that is! Today, we find out just where said odyssey will be taking us… and also talk a bit about how it reflects some of the author’s stranger real-life beliefs. First off, our cover depicts Batman, Deadman and the Joker, descending through a cave towards some unknown destination while surrounded by a swarm of bats. For the most part, this is a pretty accurate reflection of some of the issue’s content… except that the Joker does not actually appear in this comic, at all. Not even as a body possessed by Deadman. Seriously, I don’t even know why Adams didn’t just put Jamroth Bok and Primus on the cover instead, since they’re actually going with Bruce… maybe he just figured the Joker would sell more comics?
We open once again with a shirtless Bruce Wayne, this time with a steaming mug, as instead of continuing his narration, he instead switches over to… a rather different topic. I’m telling you it’s from a coffee machine brewer. Lobby for your office to get one. And on he goes, rambling about how much he just loves his new coffee machine, how it works and how Wayne Enterprises couldn’t have designed a better one if he gave them two years to work on it, and how even Alfred, who claims to hate it, still makes cappuccino on it. So… yeah. We have an extended sequence of Bruce Wayne waxing poetic about his Keurig. And no, I’m not making any of that up. As we get a brief glimpse of the hand of the person who Bruce is telling the story two and whose POV we’re presently occupying (a hand with a band-aid on it… which makes no sense whatsoever, when we learn just who this is…) Bruce begins recapping. He explains how his rage (at Reuben Irons, I think?) was really at himself for failing, and how he thinks Gordon must have explained that to Robin on their way home. From the first day I wore the costume, I avoided the truth! Not only could I not use guns… for the obvious reasons… I could not kill. Stupid, in a way. Oh, great, we’re back to Batman thinking his schtick is stupid, fun times… and the person he’s talking to agrees (and also agrees that he loves the coffee and can’t believe a machine made it – is Adams being paid to advertise Keurigs today?). Not to mention, in this very series we saw a version of Bruce just starting out as Batman where he did use guns… and the fiasco that turned into…
Bruce then stands up, revealing that while shirtless, he is wearing pants (but was he wearing them all along, or did he slip them on just now?). He starts rambling about how his quarry go to jail, and the worst, to Arkham, while reiterating that while some of them are murderers, most are just clowns of crime. Yep, we’re back on that topic again, too! He thinks the whole thing was a fantasy world, made just for him, and his companion concludes that it must have been Ra’s al Ghul who arranged it. Bruce agrees, explaining how the whole set up is to keep him distracted from what’s really important… and how, if he killed his enemies, this plot would never work (uh, actually, pretty sure it would just make more work for Ra’s, since he’d have to keep coming up with new enemies instead of reusing old ones… but I don’t think it would torpedo the plan entirely!). Bruce rambles on a bit about how he was becoming paranoid and how Ra’s was pulling all the strings for his own purposes. Ra’s needed a killer… and I was not it! But Ra’s was out of options. Imagine that. …if all Ra’s needed was a killer, why not just hire Deathstroke or Lady Shiva or someone? The DCU has no shortages of hired killers, some of whom are in the same league as Batman, Ra’s, or Sensei… Musing on how much he hates Ra’s, Bruce proceeds to recap the Ra’s/Sensei backstory for those who missed the last issue, and how Bruce got caught up in it when Ra’s decided he was the only one who could take down Sensei before Sensei kills him. His companion agrees, saying he doubts even the Justice League could defeat Sensei without losing some of their members – okay, at this point, it really just feels like Adams is shilling the guy way too hard. Sensei is a master martial artist with a lot of resources, sure… but are we really supposed to buy the guy as a Justice League tier threat, really? And even if they did bring him in, he’d only go back to Arkham… uh, why? Seriously, why? Why is Arkham literally the only place Sensei would go? I’m legitimately confused here… But Arkham is where sadly, Batman, myself, would never kill him! But outside Arkham he’s fair game, I guess?
Bruce goes on about how he’d be the perfect one to kill Sensei except that his childhood trauma left him incapable of killing, and so Ra’s was trying to teach him to kill, a thing no power on Earth could make me do. Apparently, it was Ra’s himself who hired Reuben Irons to pose as the Riddler to provoke Batman into killing him, and then told him it was Sensei who hired him, so he’d go after Sensei instead. No, we don’t see how Bruce figured this out, we’re just supposed to assume that at some point he did, I guess. That, or Adams changed his mind as to who was behind what between issues? Makes as much sense as anything… We get some more back and forth about all the strings Ra’s was pulling, and Deadman’s involvement and how he wanted revenge on Sensei for killing him…
And then suddenly we cut to Arkham Asylum, as Bruce relates a story he apparently heard secondhand. We see a bunch of the inmates (which doesn’t include any of the iconic rogues’ gallery members, so… just a bunch of beefy dudes in prison wear; underwhelming) doing some sort of construction work. A brilliant piece of work, my good fellows one of them tells the others. Solid as the queen’s rump. Time for a spot of tea. Uhh… okay. Even his fellow inmates are confused, and all the first guy will say as explanation is that he’s on the tea. Is, uh… is “the tea” a euphemism for something? One of the others complains that the tea had better not be tepid when he’s done with it… I guess puns are all the rage at Arkham these days? …and then we cut to an especially hulking inmate who is, indeed, daintily pouring cups of tea from a porcelain teapot, and feeling insulted by everyone else’s banter. So, I guess the tea… really was tea, then? What is even going on here? Speaking of tea, we cut to Sensei’s rather lavish bedroom, where a female servant approaches with a tray and offers him tea too. But he waves her off. My tea lies beyond the doors. And, indeed, one wall of his room is dominated by a very large, impressive metal door. And now I’m starting to think the tea really is a metaphor for something… *holds head in hands* Also, Sensei and his servant here are the only overtly Asian characters we’ve seen in this comic so far (Ra’s and Talia, as usual, are drawn to be rather ethnically ambiguous and noted depicted with the same sort of imagery, whereas Sensei looks like an extremely stereotypical Asian martial arts master, his apartment is decorated in a stereotypically Asian style, his overall presentation leans into “yellow peril” Asian villain tropes – and, oh yeah, his name is Sensei). Considering Sensei is also the main villain… yeah, there’s some kind of uncomfortable subtext here, not going to lie (though the worst racism in the comic starts next issue and regards a certain other group of characters we’ve not met yet). The servant comments that the doors look sturdy, but Sensei tells her the first door is poorly made and orders her to dispose of it. Which she does… by literally punching the metal door open. Yeesh. If this is typical of the sort of people Sensei keeps on staff, maybe he is a Justice League-tier threat (which makes the idea that Batman is literally the only person in the world qualified to stop him even more strange) …
The servant offers to dispose of the “shoddy” door, but Sensei assures her it was merely something to cleanse the palate (is…is he planning to eat these doors?). He’s much more interested in the rather sturdier lock on the next layer. And, well… Ahhh. The blood flows outward and back again. Each element to each element. Binding, dis-weighting… lubricating… feel… feel… feel… tiny offset crystal borrowing lubrication… now I can “see.” Deeper inside. Aha. The tumblers are misbalanced. Just so much. Each molecule… Adds… and adds, apply pressure up, then down, and down again. Now. Umph. Ah. Slowly…slowly… Yes, that’s Sensei’s mental running commentary on unlocking a door. Yes, it is bizarrely erotic (the sweat pouring down Sensei’s face as he works the lock in the art does not help). No, I have no idea why, or why Sensei’s own home includes this door in the first place. Based on the servant’s reaction, maybe unlocking difficult doors is his hobby? *shrugs* Anyway, behind that door is yet another door, made of bamboo. Sensei reflects on how sturdy it is and how it would stop most people if they didn’t have a machete… but Sensei chops through it bare-handed (and his nails are short and clean now!). He then reaches a final door, made of steel, and then he literally punches and kicks it off its hinges. What.
And so, he comes marching into the cellblock where the inmates from earlier are waiting, still separated from him by one last barred door, and they’re all… suitably impressed, I think? Man-O-Man. I never seen nothin’ like it… Master. You went tru’ them cinder blocks like a hot knife tru’ butta! In contrast, the guy pouring the tea earlier has this to say. Still, I truly doubt the evidence of my own eyes. The quality of the materials was second to none. Seriously… who are these people? Why does this issue feature a random bunch of convicts giving commentary? That’s Deadman’s job! Anyway, Sensei tells the odorous animals of decadence that he’s coming in, and then he releases… something from a bottle. It’s un-scientific one of the inmates says, and it sure is that. In fact, it’s a swarm of… what look like bees, sort of, if you asked someone to draw bees in the style of Dr. Seuss, and furthermore the person doing the drawing had never actually seen a bee and only had the vague idea of one described to them. Damn my sweet eyes. These are things of fantasy and sorcery. Not of this world. They riddle through pure iron. These could eat the world. That’s the inmates talking. Uh… whatever you say, buddies. I give up. Regardless, the… bees (my God…)?... somehow eat through the iron bars and Sensei strolls into the cell. The erudite tea-pouring convict congratulates him but claims Sensei has altered his own rules. Apparently, he promised to do “this” (whatever “this” may be… still not clear on that) himself, with no outside help, though he's not sure if the worm things (worm things? They’re very, very poorly drawn bees, but still clearly bees, and not worms!) count. Sensei tells Ephod that the only people who helped him were the inmates themselves… suddenly he reappears behind them, calmly drinking his tea, and then the inmates turn back around to see the door is fine – they opened it themselves! Everyone insists they saw the “worms,” but Sensei says it was just hypnotism. Tricks of the razor’s mind. …yeah, I don’t have the first clue what is going on here or why anymore. Sensei says they’re playing his game now, though… and his game is not so forgiving.
Sensei explains that there will be losers and one winner and is pleased when the inmates all draw their knives (no, I don’t know where they got them from, and at this point I don’t care). We then cut to… the Penguin and the Riddler, watching as the inmates tear into each other and commenting on how impressed they are with Sensei. Sheesh, now the bad guys are shilling him, too! Finally, one is the last one standing, as Sensei guessed he would be; he tells him if he heals quickly enough, he’ll be able to join the hunt for Sensei’s father, Ra’s al Ghul (so, wait, all this build-up with the doors was just so we could have a rehash of the Joker’s ‘tryouts’ scene from The Dark Knight? Huh?). Sensei muses about using trackers to run Ra’s down, though now Ra’s has vanished, and he tells the inmate that the pursuit might take him under the earth… the inmate is left wondering about that in confusion, but is relieved that he’s at least alive…
And then we cut to The not too distant future… below the earth. Okay, got to quibble here. Bruce Wayne is telling us (or rather, another character standing in for the audience) this story. It’s already happened; it’s over. This scene we’ve cut to is part of that narrative. It is yet another time jump (forward, this time!) from where we were just at (the… inexplicable scene with Sensei) but it is not, from the perspective Adams has given us, the future. Maybe this doesn’t bug anyone else… but it bugs me! Oh, and this caption is on a two-page spread depicting Batman and Jamroth Bok, riding giant bats, fighting a bunch of heavily armed guys riding T. rexes in a giant cave. That seems worth noting, too. Batman starts dodging and weaving on his, well, bat, while one of the dinosaur riders – who, despite looking like a stereotypical caveman (despite also wielding modern firearms) inexplicably has an equally stereotypical mobster accent – thinks he recognizes him as Batman. Batman tells them he just wanted to parley before swooping around and tackling one of the dino-riders; he ends up hoisting the guy over his head and casually tossing him away. It felt as if the gravity wasn’t the same as above. Everything felt… lighter. Turned out to be true. Reminded me of Newton’s experiment of a hollow earth. So… yeah. For a good chunk of the remaining story, Batman effectively has super strength due to the lower gravity. That’s a thing now. Batman takes over the guy’s tyrannosaur, while Bok flies by and warns him the dinosaurs are not as easy to control as the bats. Batman nonetheless manages to direct his mount on a rampage, though he wonders how you get off it. Do they somehow blind it? Feed it? Park it in a tar pit? Ha, ha? I mean, parking it in a tar pit would probably be fatal, so… probably not? …and that’s when “Tiny” the T. rex grabs Batman’s cape in its mouth and flings him over its head and onto the ground. That’s when I discovered… it really wasn’t loam. So… yeah. It reads like Batman just ended up in a pile of dinosaur poop. Fun times! (Next issue, alas, will indicate it was just a pile of rocks he hit, but dino dung is funnier… and also something one would seem more likely to mistake for loam…)
Anyway, some of the other riders gloat about how stupid Batman’s cape was, though Bok and Primus then end up taking them out (despite Bok also wearing a cape…). Bok accuses the riders of stealing their mounts, while Batman is left lying prone on the ground, thinking about how he’s having yet another bad day (well, you just got dropped into what may or may not be a pile of dino dung purely by your own incompetence, so… I’d agree with that!). He starts reflecting about how it almost feels nice (not the word I’d use…) and that he’s got blood running to his head… and then we cut to Wayne Manor, where Alfred is serving Ra’s tea! Alfred explains that Bruce will be up soon, so we have yet another time jump, this time backwards to before Bruce ended up… wherever he was fighting dinosaurs last page. Ra’s actually takes a moment to compliment Alfred’s tea, noting that it’s rare to find a Westerner who makes it so well. …you know what, I kind of think we need more Ra’s and Alfred interactions, not only because Alfred is Bruce’s father-figure and Ra’s kind of is too in his twisted way, because I’m sure they’d despise each other but be far too polite to say it outright; the passive-aggressive snark-fu would be legendary. Anyway, we then cut to Bruce’s bedroom where Ra’s has taken up a seat by the bed, while Bruce… is hanging from the gymnastics equipment he has mounted on the ceiling with his legs held straight out, impressing Ra’s. Apparently, it’s an exercise Bruce learned from paralyzed veterans to build upper body strength, but… one is compelled to wonder at the fact that Bruce has this sort of equipment mounted directly above his bed for convenient use…
Ra’s and Bruce discuss the exercises a bit more (it’s actually kind of nice to see two martial masters talking shop like this, and to get a reminder that Ra’s and Bruce are enemies but do respect one another’s abilities, as baffling as the surrounding context may be), and then they head off down a hallway; Ra’s is sure Sensei will find him here, but Bruce assures him he won’t. He says no one ever has, and calls Ra’s a liar for claiming he has. Ummm, okay, Bruce? You’re a famous billionaire playboy, heir to a famous old-money family and Sensei has been running Ra’s’ operations in Gotham (including Arkham, which is apparently all about keeping you distracted), and Ra’s knows who you are. Is it really that much of a stretch to think he might be able to put it together? Or just do what Ra’s himself did in the original “Daughter of the Demon” story (before Adams inexplicably decided to retcon his own work here) and track down anyone in Gotham rich enough to operate as Batman, and then work his way down to the most likely suspect? It’s not like you live in some secret place nobody can find… nonetheless, Bruce insists that Wayne Manor never will be found, unless Ra’s has a traitor in his family (considering this whole mess started because Ra’s does, in fact, have a traitor in his family…). Ra’s seems confused that Bruce trusts his family (uh, I think?) and then is stunned when Bruce shows him the secret entrance to the Batcave, hidden behind a grandfather clock (wait… Ra’s was in the Batcave last night. This morning, he’s in the house. The easiest assumption is that he came up to the house from the cave… did he just not notice where the entrance was, or what?). They get into the hidden elevator, still arguing about better places to hide the entrance; Bruce also says that one of the words he said activated it but won’t say which one.
They arrive at the Batcave, where Bruce explains that he, Jamroth Bok and Primus will be going to the Underworld, to which Ra’s responds What? And what of me? Uh… you’ll be here, hiding in the Batcave and/or the manor? Was that not, in fact, the plan all along? Ra’s insists that as soon as Bruce leaves, Sensei will find him and kill him. Damn you, and your miserable life, Bruce responds… and reveals that Sensei kidnapped Talia and took her to the Underworld! *beat* What? We’re learning this now? Last we heard of Talia, she was safe in Wayne Manor, too! When and how did she get kidnapped? When did Bruce learn about it? Why didn’t we see it? Gah, why does this comic keep having important things happening off-page, while wasting time on things like Sensei possibly getting off on unlocking doors? Ra’s is all the more determined to come with Bruce, but Bruce insists he’s got a target on his back and will be dead as soon as he leaves the house (I mean… it’s not like death’s ever been that much of an inconvenience for Ra’s…). But Bok won’t guide Bruce if Ra’s is with them. Your minions kidnapped his woman, or did you forget? Apparently, this was to keep Bok from warning Bruce (I’m starting to get very lost about who was trying to warn Bruce about what, and who was trying to stop them and why…). He defied you… his woman is still missing. And you. Can you give him back his woman? …am, am I the only one who’s getting skeeved out by the fact that this lady is only described as Bok’s “woman?” Not by her name, or even as his “wife” or “girlfriend” or “lover?” Not helping is that, in the grand scheme of things, she’s barely even a character, just a plot device, existing solely as a damsel in distress to keep Bok involved in the plot (not helping is that being a damsel in distress will also be Talia’s role for much of the remainder of the comic). Ra’s admits he’s lost control of much of his empire and can’t, in fact, restore Bok’s “woman” to him. And so, Ra’s is going to be staying here with Alfred while Bruce goes with Bok (alas, while we’ll get a few scenes with them, we’re not going to be getting the Ra’s-and-Alfred buddy comedy in this series; a pity).
Robin, meanwhile, is all excited to get going… but Bruce isn’t bringing him along, either. It’s not your fight. Considering what you just learned last issue about Dick’s parents… it kind of is? Alfred says it’s for the best, but Dick insists Bruce needs him. You got a neanderthal and lizard boy to back you up, and you’re going to some insane place inside the earth… and for some idiotic reason you don’t need me, and won’t tell me why? Yeah, I’m kind of with Dick on this one. Bruce isn’t doing a good job of explaining himself here. Also, the neanderthal in question is Jamroth Bok. And yes, that’s literally what he is. It’s not an insult; Jamroth Bok is an actual, flesh-and-blood neanderthal. And that’s not even getting into what Primus is… more on that later. Bruce is left stumbling, and Robin tells him to go to hell and storms out. Ooof. First Bruce and Alfred, now Dick and Bruce… this series has more than its fair share of members of the Bat-family telling their father-figures to go to hell, doesn’t it? Speaking of Alfred, he tells everyone he has their equipment ready and heads off to comfort Dick, though before he leaves, he makes it clear he thinks Bruce is handling things pretty shabbily. Ra’s, meanwhile, decides maybe he’ll stay after all, and in the process looks so utterly bummed out about the situation it’s kind of amazing, and I’m genuinely kind of surprised Sad Ra’s hasn’t become more of a meme. I mean… just look at the poor guy!
We cut to Bruce, Bok and Primus a few minutes later as they descend from the Batcave through a passage Bruce has never explored before. Primus, by the way, calls him Flying-Mammal-Man. What a mouthful! We then cut back to Wayne Manor, where Alfred walks in on Robin exercising. Alfred explains a bit about what he’s gathered – that Jamroth Bok is, in fact, a real neanderthal, descended from neanderthals driven underground by homo sapiens tens of millennia ago. Though that doesn’t explain how Bok got his Batman costume – and Primus isn’t even a mammal (he does, I’ll note, have a full head of hair…). As it turns out… Primus is a dinosaur. Yes, really. Apparently, after millions of years underground, surviving dinosaurs evolved… to look indistinguishable from a blond-haired white teenager, except for the tail and the creepy unhinged mouth? I know, I know, it’s not like the DC Universe is hard sci-fi at the best of times, but still… huh? Just… wow. Robin’s just as disbelieving as I am, but Alfred thinks that the Underworld is full of supposedly extinct creatures…and that’s when Alfred gets possessed by Deadman, I think (or possibly Deadman is releasing Alfred from being possessed? The art isn’t very clear…) and the scene ends right there, answering nothing.
Meanwhile, Bruce is explaining to Primus and Bok that he’d thought neanderthals and dinosaurs were extinct. Primus thinks this is very funny (glad someone does…) and that’s when Bok reveals… this. I’m a, blush, fan. An unreconstructed fan of yours. Did he just say “blush?” And so, yes, a subterranean neanderthal is a Batman fan – such a big Batman fan that he decided to dress up like him so he could become a hero, too! That is… a thing that is happening now! And I don’t know if it’s stupid or amazing. Just wait until we get our explanation of how any of this is possible… Primus jumps in to add that Bok is the greatest hero in the underworld – and he is Bok’s sidekick! On the other hand, Bruce has no difficulty believing that Primus is a dinosaur. You know, with the past few days he’s had, I’m starting to think he’s just given up and is rolling with everything. Meanwhile, the further they go down, the lighter they get, which Primus explains is because of all the mass above them, pulling them upward. As for pressure, they come down slowly enough it doesn’t matter. Suddenly, they run into a wall of crystal – apparently, this is what supports the underworld! Bok and Primus compare it to a giant geode… which Bok demonstrates by grabbing an actual geode (that was just… handy there, I guess? Convenient!) and breaking it open. He explains how, just like in a normal geode, as the crystals grow, they push the world’s surface further outward, creating massive pockets of livable space inside. And so, Primus gestures for Bruce and Bok to follow him around the crystals… and into a massive, two-page spread of the Underworld’s panorama. And I’ve got to say, as weird as the context is (more in a minute) the art here is indeed pretty magnificent. Oh my sweet God, says Bruce. Good to be back, says Primus. And on that note, the issue comes to an end.
So, before we got, at this point it seems like it’s time to discuss something… rather important about Neal Adams, and why he seems to have written this story the way he did. Aside from his work in comics, Adams was famous (or infamous) for something else… he was a hardcore devotee of the “expanding earth” theory. When this theory – which is exactly what it sounds like, the idea that the earth is slowly but constantly growing, shifting the continents around as it does - was first proposed, it was a legitimate scientific theory, since a lot about the Earth’s nature and structure was still a mystery at that point. Of course, once the existence of plate tectonics was proven, providing a much more plausible explanation for how the planet changes over the course of eons, the notion of an expanding earth was pretty conclusively disproven and passed from the realm of serious science into the realm of pseudoscience and conspiracy cranks. And that’s where people like Neal Adams came in. Adams reportedly believed that the Earth really was growing (along with a dizzying array of other pseudoscientific theories to support just how such a thing as a constantly expanding planet would be possible); I don’t know if he really thought it was full of neanderthals and dinosaurs, but the geode stuff in this issue really is an intro to some basic Expanding Earth Ideas 101. Even after his death, his website still has all his old videos on the expanding earth posted (most of them paywalled). It’s wild stuff! Arguably making it even weirder is that DC already has its own take on the hollow earth idea in the form of Skartaris from the Warlord comics… and then Adams just ignores that completely and makes up his own version of the hollow earth instead, possibly to tie in better with the related-but-distinct expanding earth ideas. It also means that at least some of the craziness present in the back half of this series genuinely reflects the author’s actual real-world beliefs, which… explains some things. Like why after we’ve had a whole subplot about how Batman’s rogues are a bunch of “clowns” the powers that be use to distract him from what’s really important… the story’s idea of “what’s really important” involves traveling to the center of the earth to fight dinosaurs instead of, you know, literally anything else.
Anyway, aside from the expanding earth stuff, this issue is still pretty wild. Major plot developments happen off-page. Keeping track of who knows what, who’s trying to keep secrets from who, and why any of this is actually happening is becoming increasingly difficult. We have an extended sequence of our main antagonist unlocking a series of doors so he can fetch his morning tea, with commentary from the surprisingly erudite denizens of Arkham Asylum, which only becomes tangentially relevant to the overall story at the very end. And I’m pretty sure Bruce Wayne does a paid advertisement for Keurig. But at least the titular odyssey has finally begun! What a way to start off Volume Two! Next time, we bid farewell to shirtless Bruce, continue our journey through the Underworld, and meet Primus’s people! We’ll see you then!
Warning: This issue features some violence and is also image-heavy.
MG: Well, everyone, it’s time to continue our journey through Neal Adams’ Batman: Odyssey, as we leave Volume I behind and officially enter Volume II! Last time, Batman made it to Arkham, fought a guy named Dr. Slattern (who mercifully immediately changed his name to “Trigger” instead) learned that the head of Arkham, Dr. Chu, is really Ra’s al Ghul’s son Sensei and the one behind everything he’s been facing in this series, and decided the time has come to go on an odyssey… after taking a nap in the middle of the Batcave, that is! Today, we find out just where said odyssey will be taking us… and also talk a bit about how it reflects some of the author’s stranger real-life beliefs. First off, our cover depicts Batman, Deadman and the Joker, descending through a cave towards some unknown destination while surrounded by a swarm of bats. For the most part, this is a pretty accurate reflection of some of the issue’s content… except that the Joker does not actually appear in this comic, at all. Not even as a body possessed by Deadman. Seriously, I don’t even know why Adams didn’t just put Jamroth Bok and Primus on the cover instead, since they’re actually going with Bruce… maybe he just figured the Joker would sell more comics?
We open once again with a shirtless Bruce Wayne, this time with a steaming mug, as instead of continuing his narration, he instead switches over to… a rather different topic. I’m telling you it’s from a coffee machine brewer. Lobby for your office to get one. And on he goes, rambling about how much he just loves his new coffee machine, how it works and how Wayne Enterprises couldn’t have designed a better one if he gave them two years to work on it, and how even Alfred, who claims to hate it, still makes cappuccino on it. So… yeah. We have an extended sequence of Bruce Wayne waxing poetic about his Keurig. And no, I’m not making any of that up. As we get a brief glimpse of the hand of the person who Bruce is telling the story two and whose POV we’re presently occupying (a hand with a band-aid on it… which makes no sense whatsoever, when we learn just who this is…) Bruce begins recapping. He explains how his rage (at Reuben Irons, I think?) was really at himself for failing, and how he thinks Gordon must have explained that to Robin on their way home. From the first day I wore the costume, I avoided the truth! Not only could I not use guns… for the obvious reasons… I could not kill. Stupid, in a way. Oh, great, we’re back to Batman thinking his schtick is stupid, fun times… and the person he’s talking to agrees (and also agrees that he loves the coffee and can’t believe a machine made it – is Adams being paid to advertise Keurigs today?). Not to mention, in this very series we saw a version of Bruce just starting out as Batman where he did use guns… and the fiasco that turned into…
Bruce then stands up, revealing that while shirtless, he is wearing pants (but was he wearing them all along, or did he slip them on just now?). He starts rambling about how his quarry go to jail, and the worst, to Arkham, while reiterating that while some of them are murderers, most are just clowns of crime. Yep, we’re back on that topic again, too! He thinks the whole thing was a fantasy world, made just for him, and his companion concludes that it must have been Ra’s al Ghul who arranged it. Bruce agrees, explaining how the whole set up is to keep him distracted from what’s really important… and how, if he killed his enemies, this plot would never work (uh, actually, pretty sure it would just make more work for Ra’s, since he’d have to keep coming up with new enemies instead of reusing old ones… but I don’t think it would torpedo the plan entirely!). Bruce rambles on a bit about how he was becoming paranoid and how Ra’s was pulling all the strings for his own purposes. Ra’s needed a killer… and I was not it! But Ra’s was out of options. Imagine that. …if all Ra’s needed was a killer, why not just hire Deathstroke or Lady Shiva or someone? The DCU has no shortages of hired killers, some of whom are in the same league as Batman, Ra’s, or Sensei… Musing on how much he hates Ra’s, Bruce proceeds to recap the Ra’s/Sensei backstory for those who missed the last issue, and how Bruce got caught up in it when Ra’s decided he was the only one who could take down Sensei before Sensei kills him. His companion agrees, saying he doubts even the Justice League could defeat Sensei without losing some of their members – okay, at this point, it really just feels like Adams is shilling the guy way too hard. Sensei is a master martial artist with a lot of resources, sure… but are we really supposed to buy the guy as a Justice League tier threat, really? And even if they did bring him in, he’d only go back to Arkham… uh, why? Seriously, why? Why is Arkham literally the only place Sensei would go? I’m legitimately confused here… But Arkham is where sadly, Batman, myself, would never kill him! But outside Arkham he’s fair game, I guess?
Bruce goes on about how he’d be the perfect one to kill Sensei except that his childhood trauma left him incapable of killing, and so Ra’s was trying to teach him to kill, a thing no power on Earth could make me do. Apparently, it was Ra’s himself who hired Reuben Irons to pose as the Riddler to provoke Batman into killing him, and then told him it was Sensei who hired him, so he’d go after Sensei instead. No, we don’t see how Bruce figured this out, we’re just supposed to assume that at some point he did, I guess. That, or Adams changed his mind as to who was behind what between issues? Makes as much sense as anything… We get some more back and forth about all the strings Ra’s was pulling, and Deadman’s involvement and how he wanted revenge on Sensei for killing him…
And then suddenly we cut to Arkham Asylum, as Bruce relates a story he apparently heard secondhand. We see a bunch of the inmates (which doesn’t include any of the iconic rogues’ gallery members, so… just a bunch of beefy dudes in prison wear; underwhelming) doing some sort of construction work. A brilliant piece of work, my good fellows one of them tells the others. Solid as the queen’s rump. Time for a spot of tea. Uhh… okay. Even his fellow inmates are confused, and all the first guy will say as explanation is that he’s on the tea. Is, uh… is “the tea” a euphemism for something? One of the others complains that the tea had better not be tepid when he’s done with it… I guess puns are all the rage at Arkham these days? …and then we cut to an especially hulking inmate who is, indeed, daintily pouring cups of tea from a porcelain teapot, and feeling insulted by everyone else’s banter. So, I guess the tea… really was tea, then? What is even going on here? Speaking of tea, we cut to Sensei’s rather lavish bedroom, where a female servant approaches with a tray and offers him tea too. But he waves her off. My tea lies beyond the doors. And, indeed, one wall of his room is dominated by a very large, impressive metal door. And now I’m starting to think the tea really is a metaphor for something… *holds head in hands* Also, Sensei and his servant here are the only overtly Asian characters we’ve seen in this comic so far (Ra’s and Talia, as usual, are drawn to be rather ethnically ambiguous and noted depicted with the same sort of imagery, whereas Sensei looks like an extremely stereotypical Asian martial arts master, his apartment is decorated in a stereotypically Asian style, his overall presentation leans into “yellow peril” Asian villain tropes – and, oh yeah, his name is Sensei). Considering Sensei is also the main villain… yeah, there’s some kind of uncomfortable subtext here, not going to lie (though the worst racism in the comic starts next issue and regards a certain other group of characters we’ve not met yet). The servant comments that the doors look sturdy, but Sensei tells her the first door is poorly made and orders her to dispose of it. Which she does… by literally punching the metal door open. Yeesh. If this is typical of the sort of people Sensei keeps on staff, maybe he is a Justice League-tier threat (which makes the idea that Batman is literally the only person in the world qualified to stop him even more strange) …
The servant offers to dispose of the “shoddy” door, but Sensei assures her it was merely something to cleanse the palate (is…is he planning to eat these doors?). He’s much more interested in the rather sturdier lock on the next layer. And, well… Ahhh. The blood flows outward and back again. Each element to each element. Binding, dis-weighting… lubricating… feel… feel… feel… tiny offset crystal borrowing lubrication… now I can “see.” Deeper inside. Aha. The tumblers are misbalanced. Just so much. Each molecule… Adds… and adds, apply pressure up, then down, and down again. Now. Umph. Ah. Slowly…slowly… Yes, that’s Sensei’s mental running commentary on unlocking a door. Yes, it is bizarrely erotic (the sweat pouring down Sensei’s face as he works the lock in the art does not help). No, I have no idea why, or why Sensei’s own home includes this door in the first place. Based on the servant’s reaction, maybe unlocking difficult doors is his hobby? *shrugs* Anyway, behind that door is yet another door, made of bamboo. Sensei reflects on how sturdy it is and how it would stop most people if they didn’t have a machete… but Sensei chops through it bare-handed (and his nails are short and clean now!). He then reaches a final door, made of steel, and then he literally punches and kicks it off its hinges. What.
And so, he comes marching into the cellblock where the inmates from earlier are waiting, still separated from him by one last barred door, and they’re all… suitably impressed, I think? Man-O-Man. I never seen nothin’ like it… Master. You went tru’ them cinder blocks like a hot knife tru’ butta! In contrast, the guy pouring the tea earlier has this to say. Still, I truly doubt the evidence of my own eyes. The quality of the materials was second to none. Seriously… who are these people? Why does this issue feature a random bunch of convicts giving commentary? That’s Deadman’s job! Anyway, Sensei tells the odorous animals of decadence that he’s coming in, and then he releases… something from a bottle. It’s un-scientific one of the inmates says, and it sure is that. In fact, it’s a swarm of… what look like bees, sort of, if you asked someone to draw bees in the style of Dr. Seuss, and furthermore the person doing the drawing had never actually seen a bee and only had the vague idea of one described to them. Damn my sweet eyes. These are things of fantasy and sorcery. Not of this world. They riddle through pure iron. These could eat the world. That’s the inmates talking. Uh… whatever you say, buddies. I give up. Regardless, the… bees (my God…)?... somehow eat through the iron bars and Sensei strolls into the cell. The erudite tea-pouring convict congratulates him but claims Sensei has altered his own rules. Apparently, he promised to do “this” (whatever “this” may be… still not clear on that) himself, with no outside help, though he's not sure if the worm things (worm things? They’re very, very poorly drawn bees, but still clearly bees, and not worms!) count. Sensei tells Ephod that the only people who helped him were the inmates themselves… suddenly he reappears behind them, calmly drinking his tea, and then the inmates turn back around to see the door is fine – they opened it themselves! Everyone insists they saw the “worms,” but Sensei says it was just hypnotism. Tricks of the razor’s mind. …yeah, I don’t have the first clue what is going on here or why anymore. Sensei says they’re playing his game now, though… and his game is not so forgiving.
Sensei explains that there will be losers and one winner and is pleased when the inmates all draw their knives (no, I don’t know where they got them from, and at this point I don’t care). We then cut to… the Penguin and the Riddler, watching as the inmates tear into each other and commenting on how impressed they are with Sensei. Sheesh, now the bad guys are shilling him, too! Finally, one is the last one standing, as Sensei guessed he would be; he tells him if he heals quickly enough, he’ll be able to join the hunt for Sensei’s father, Ra’s al Ghul (so, wait, all this build-up with the doors was just so we could have a rehash of the Joker’s ‘tryouts’ scene from The Dark Knight? Huh?). Sensei muses about using trackers to run Ra’s down, though now Ra’s has vanished, and he tells the inmate that the pursuit might take him under the earth… the inmate is left wondering about that in confusion, but is relieved that he’s at least alive…
And then we cut to The not too distant future… below the earth. Okay, got to quibble here. Bruce Wayne is telling us (or rather, another character standing in for the audience) this story. It’s already happened; it’s over. This scene we’ve cut to is part of that narrative. It is yet another time jump (forward, this time!) from where we were just at (the… inexplicable scene with Sensei) but it is not, from the perspective Adams has given us, the future. Maybe this doesn’t bug anyone else… but it bugs me! Oh, and this caption is on a two-page spread depicting Batman and Jamroth Bok, riding giant bats, fighting a bunch of heavily armed guys riding T. rexes in a giant cave. That seems worth noting, too. Batman starts dodging and weaving on his, well, bat, while one of the dinosaur riders – who, despite looking like a stereotypical caveman (despite also wielding modern firearms) inexplicably has an equally stereotypical mobster accent – thinks he recognizes him as Batman. Batman tells them he just wanted to parley before swooping around and tackling one of the dino-riders; he ends up hoisting the guy over his head and casually tossing him away. It felt as if the gravity wasn’t the same as above. Everything felt… lighter. Turned out to be true. Reminded me of Newton’s experiment of a hollow earth. So… yeah. For a good chunk of the remaining story, Batman effectively has super strength due to the lower gravity. That’s a thing now. Batman takes over the guy’s tyrannosaur, while Bok flies by and warns him the dinosaurs are not as easy to control as the bats. Batman nonetheless manages to direct his mount on a rampage, though he wonders how you get off it. Do they somehow blind it? Feed it? Park it in a tar pit? Ha, ha? I mean, parking it in a tar pit would probably be fatal, so… probably not? …and that’s when “Tiny” the T. rex grabs Batman’s cape in its mouth and flings him over its head and onto the ground. That’s when I discovered… it really wasn’t loam. So… yeah. It reads like Batman just ended up in a pile of dinosaur poop. Fun times! (Next issue, alas, will indicate it was just a pile of rocks he hit, but dino dung is funnier… and also something one would seem more likely to mistake for loam…)
Anyway, some of the other riders gloat about how stupid Batman’s cape was, though Bok and Primus then end up taking them out (despite Bok also wearing a cape…). Bok accuses the riders of stealing their mounts, while Batman is left lying prone on the ground, thinking about how he’s having yet another bad day (well, you just got dropped into what may or may not be a pile of dino dung purely by your own incompetence, so… I’d agree with that!). He starts reflecting about how it almost feels nice (not the word I’d use…) and that he’s got blood running to his head… and then we cut to Wayne Manor, where Alfred is serving Ra’s tea! Alfred explains that Bruce will be up soon, so we have yet another time jump, this time backwards to before Bruce ended up… wherever he was fighting dinosaurs last page. Ra’s actually takes a moment to compliment Alfred’s tea, noting that it’s rare to find a Westerner who makes it so well. …you know what, I kind of think we need more Ra’s and Alfred interactions, not only because Alfred is Bruce’s father-figure and Ra’s kind of is too in his twisted way, because I’m sure they’d despise each other but be far too polite to say it outright; the passive-aggressive snark-fu would be legendary. Anyway, we then cut to Bruce’s bedroom where Ra’s has taken up a seat by the bed, while Bruce… is hanging from the gymnastics equipment he has mounted on the ceiling with his legs held straight out, impressing Ra’s. Apparently, it’s an exercise Bruce learned from paralyzed veterans to build upper body strength, but… one is compelled to wonder at the fact that Bruce has this sort of equipment mounted directly above his bed for convenient use…
Ra’s and Bruce discuss the exercises a bit more (it’s actually kind of nice to see two martial masters talking shop like this, and to get a reminder that Ra’s and Bruce are enemies but do respect one another’s abilities, as baffling as the surrounding context may be), and then they head off down a hallway; Ra’s is sure Sensei will find him here, but Bruce assures him he won’t. He says no one ever has, and calls Ra’s a liar for claiming he has. Ummm, okay, Bruce? You’re a famous billionaire playboy, heir to a famous old-money family and Sensei has been running Ra’s’ operations in Gotham (including Arkham, which is apparently all about keeping you distracted), and Ra’s knows who you are. Is it really that much of a stretch to think he might be able to put it together? Or just do what Ra’s himself did in the original “Daughter of the Demon” story (before Adams inexplicably decided to retcon his own work here) and track down anyone in Gotham rich enough to operate as Batman, and then work his way down to the most likely suspect? It’s not like you live in some secret place nobody can find… nonetheless, Bruce insists that Wayne Manor never will be found, unless Ra’s has a traitor in his family (considering this whole mess started because Ra’s does, in fact, have a traitor in his family…). Ra’s seems confused that Bruce trusts his family (uh, I think?) and then is stunned when Bruce shows him the secret entrance to the Batcave, hidden behind a grandfather clock (wait… Ra’s was in the Batcave last night. This morning, he’s in the house. The easiest assumption is that he came up to the house from the cave… did he just not notice where the entrance was, or what?). They get into the hidden elevator, still arguing about better places to hide the entrance; Bruce also says that one of the words he said activated it but won’t say which one.
They arrive at the Batcave, where Bruce explains that he, Jamroth Bok and Primus will be going to the Underworld, to which Ra’s responds What? And what of me? Uh… you’ll be here, hiding in the Batcave and/or the manor? Was that not, in fact, the plan all along? Ra’s insists that as soon as Bruce leaves, Sensei will find him and kill him. Damn you, and your miserable life, Bruce responds… and reveals that Sensei kidnapped Talia and took her to the Underworld! *beat* What? We’re learning this now? Last we heard of Talia, she was safe in Wayne Manor, too! When and how did she get kidnapped? When did Bruce learn about it? Why didn’t we see it? Gah, why does this comic keep having important things happening off-page, while wasting time on things like Sensei possibly getting off on unlocking doors? Ra’s is all the more determined to come with Bruce, but Bruce insists he’s got a target on his back and will be dead as soon as he leaves the house (I mean… it’s not like death’s ever been that much of an inconvenience for Ra’s…). But Bok won’t guide Bruce if Ra’s is with them. Your minions kidnapped his woman, or did you forget? Apparently, this was to keep Bok from warning Bruce (I’m starting to get very lost about who was trying to warn Bruce about what, and who was trying to stop them and why…). He defied you… his woman is still missing. And you. Can you give him back his woman? …am, am I the only one who’s getting skeeved out by the fact that this lady is only described as Bok’s “woman?” Not by her name, or even as his “wife” or “girlfriend” or “lover?” Not helping is that, in the grand scheme of things, she’s barely even a character, just a plot device, existing solely as a damsel in distress to keep Bok involved in the plot (not helping is that being a damsel in distress will also be Talia’s role for much of the remainder of the comic). Ra’s admits he’s lost control of much of his empire and can’t, in fact, restore Bok’s “woman” to him. And so, Ra’s is going to be staying here with Alfred while Bruce goes with Bok (alas, while we’ll get a few scenes with them, we’re not going to be getting the Ra’s-and-Alfred buddy comedy in this series; a pity).
Robin, meanwhile, is all excited to get going… but Bruce isn’t bringing him along, either. It’s not your fight. Considering what you just learned last issue about Dick’s parents… it kind of is? Alfred says it’s for the best, but Dick insists Bruce needs him. You got a neanderthal and lizard boy to back you up, and you’re going to some insane place inside the earth… and for some idiotic reason you don’t need me, and won’t tell me why? Yeah, I’m kind of with Dick on this one. Bruce isn’t doing a good job of explaining himself here. Also, the neanderthal in question is Jamroth Bok. And yes, that’s literally what he is. It’s not an insult; Jamroth Bok is an actual, flesh-and-blood neanderthal. And that’s not even getting into what Primus is… more on that later. Bruce is left stumbling, and Robin tells him to go to hell and storms out. Ooof. First Bruce and Alfred, now Dick and Bruce… this series has more than its fair share of members of the Bat-family telling their father-figures to go to hell, doesn’t it? Speaking of Alfred, he tells everyone he has their equipment ready and heads off to comfort Dick, though before he leaves, he makes it clear he thinks Bruce is handling things pretty shabbily. Ra’s, meanwhile, decides maybe he’ll stay after all, and in the process looks so utterly bummed out about the situation it’s kind of amazing, and I’m genuinely kind of surprised Sad Ra’s hasn’t become more of a meme. I mean… just look at the poor guy!
We cut to Bruce, Bok and Primus a few minutes later as they descend from the Batcave through a passage Bruce has never explored before. Primus, by the way, calls him Flying-Mammal-Man. What a mouthful! We then cut back to Wayne Manor, where Alfred walks in on Robin exercising. Alfred explains a bit about what he’s gathered – that Jamroth Bok is, in fact, a real neanderthal, descended from neanderthals driven underground by homo sapiens tens of millennia ago. Though that doesn’t explain how Bok got his Batman costume – and Primus isn’t even a mammal (he does, I’ll note, have a full head of hair…). As it turns out… Primus is a dinosaur. Yes, really. Apparently, after millions of years underground, surviving dinosaurs evolved… to look indistinguishable from a blond-haired white teenager, except for the tail and the creepy unhinged mouth? I know, I know, it’s not like the DC Universe is hard sci-fi at the best of times, but still… huh? Just… wow. Robin’s just as disbelieving as I am, but Alfred thinks that the Underworld is full of supposedly extinct creatures…and that’s when Alfred gets possessed by Deadman, I think (or possibly Deadman is releasing Alfred from being possessed? The art isn’t very clear…) and the scene ends right there, answering nothing.
Meanwhile, Bruce is explaining to Primus and Bok that he’d thought neanderthals and dinosaurs were extinct. Primus thinks this is very funny (glad someone does…) and that’s when Bok reveals… this. I’m a, blush, fan. An unreconstructed fan of yours. Did he just say “blush?” And so, yes, a subterranean neanderthal is a Batman fan – such a big Batman fan that he decided to dress up like him so he could become a hero, too! That is… a thing that is happening now! And I don’t know if it’s stupid or amazing. Just wait until we get our explanation of how any of this is possible… Primus jumps in to add that Bok is the greatest hero in the underworld – and he is Bok’s sidekick! On the other hand, Bruce has no difficulty believing that Primus is a dinosaur. You know, with the past few days he’s had, I’m starting to think he’s just given up and is rolling with everything. Meanwhile, the further they go down, the lighter they get, which Primus explains is because of all the mass above them, pulling them upward. As for pressure, they come down slowly enough it doesn’t matter. Suddenly, they run into a wall of crystal – apparently, this is what supports the underworld! Bok and Primus compare it to a giant geode… which Bok demonstrates by grabbing an actual geode (that was just… handy there, I guess? Convenient!) and breaking it open. He explains how, just like in a normal geode, as the crystals grow, they push the world’s surface further outward, creating massive pockets of livable space inside. And so, Primus gestures for Bruce and Bok to follow him around the crystals… and into a massive, two-page spread of the Underworld’s panorama. And I’ve got to say, as weird as the context is (more in a minute) the art here is indeed pretty magnificent. Oh my sweet God, says Bruce. Good to be back, says Primus. And on that note, the issue comes to an end.
So, before we got, at this point it seems like it’s time to discuss something… rather important about Neal Adams, and why he seems to have written this story the way he did. Aside from his work in comics, Adams was famous (or infamous) for something else… he was a hardcore devotee of the “expanding earth” theory. When this theory – which is exactly what it sounds like, the idea that the earth is slowly but constantly growing, shifting the continents around as it does - was first proposed, it was a legitimate scientific theory, since a lot about the Earth’s nature and structure was still a mystery at that point. Of course, once the existence of plate tectonics was proven, providing a much more plausible explanation for how the planet changes over the course of eons, the notion of an expanding earth was pretty conclusively disproven and passed from the realm of serious science into the realm of pseudoscience and conspiracy cranks. And that’s where people like Neal Adams came in. Adams reportedly believed that the Earth really was growing (along with a dizzying array of other pseudoscientific theories to support just how such a thing as a constantly expanding planet would be possible); I don’t know if he really thought it was full of neanderthals and dinosaurs, but the geode stuff in this issue really is an intro to some basic Expanding Earth Ideas 101. Even after his death, his website still has all his old videos on the expanding earth posted (most of them paywalled). It’s wild stuff! Arguably making it even weirder is that DC already has its own take on the hollow earth idea in the form of Skartaris from the Warlord comics… and then Adams just ignores that completely and makes up his own version of the hollow earth instead, possibly to tie in better with the related-but-distinct expanding earth ideas. It also means that at least some of the craziness present in the back half of this series genuinely reflects the author’s actual real-world beliefs, which… explains some things. Like why after we’ve had a whole subplot about how Batman’s rogues are a bunch of “clowns” the powers that be use to distract him from what’s really important… the story’s idea of “what’s really important” involves traveling to the center of the earth to fight dinosaurs instead of, you know, literally anything else.
Anyway, aside from the expanding earth stuff, this issue is still pretty wild. Major plot developments happen off-page. Keeping track of who knows what, who’s trying to keep secrets from who, and why any of this is actually happening is becoming increasingly difficult. We have an extended sequence of our main antagonist unlocking a series of doors so he can fetch his morning tea, with commentary from the surprisingly erudite denizens of Arkham Asylum, which only becomes tangentially relevant to the overall story at the very end. And I’m pretty sure Bruce Wayne does a paid advertisement for Keurig. But at least the titular odyssey has finally begun! What a way to start off Volume Two! Next time, we bid farewell to shirtless Bruce, continue our journey through the Underworld, and meet Primus’s people! We’ll see you then!
